Daily Archives: February 5, 2009

Ask Colemand: What is a Frong?

ColemandHello.

Klinderas asked me to answer some questions he’s been getting.  He says it’s “good for our Public Relations”.

Which is a pile of bull-crap.  Undead as PR? Are you serious? We’re uglier than your rat-ass, you pansy elf!

Go get a hair cut!

HEY! Get that dog away from me.  I swear to god that if it tries to run away with my arm again, I’m going to eat it’s brains for breakfast.

Good.  Stupid Dog.

I SAID NOTHING.  LEAVE ME ALONE.

In any case, lets answer some of the questions that Klinderas was too air-headed to answer himself.  Git.

What is a Tree Frong?aoirselvar, A.K.A as Bob.

That is a very good question.  A tree frong is a type of fungus found inside of damp areas, frequently under plant roots in moist caves.  They are pretty hard to find, but when you do, you should pick them.  They taste like a sweet potato, but with a bitter aftertaste.  I use it to counter-point and accentuate the brilliant, vibrant, and overly sweet taste of Gnomes.  Doesn’t go well with Warlocks though, nothing ever does.

Survival or Beastmaster? -Search Engine Term (SET)

Well, there’s good and bad to both.  Survival hunters are generally a bit stringy, and are tough to chew.  This is because of the amount of training they go through, their muscles get exceptionally tough.  On the other hand, cooked properly, survival hunters are a delicassy and used to be hard to find.  Now everyone is trying to be one, and the large majority taste like crap.

Now, Beastmasters are a little easier to find, and they’re easier to chew.  They also come with a delicious side dish! The only problem is getting a stomach big enough for them.

Can I be you friend? – Some dude

Now, kids.  Lets be clear; you can do anything you put your mind to.

Now, lets be honest.  Not likely.

…Is that it? Is that all?

Hrrmph.  Then I’m done here.  Klinderas, here’s your mob.  If they want more stuff answered, they should send an e-mail(slowwolfblog[at]yahoo[dot]ca) or ask via Twitter.  I’d be happy to answer some questions.

… so long as you keep the gnomes coming.  They’re like hallowe’en candies! Small, sweet, and gone in 2 seconds.

/shuffle

Thank you Colemand.  Leave the chair.  Now please.  Thank you.

I apologize to all the gnomes out there.  I assure you that, despite you being small, annoying, and mindbogglingly still living, I do not feed him gnomes.  Lepergnomes, maybe, but he doesn’t care.

Just don’t actually tell him that, ok?

Why Do We Do This?

dps-baby

From WoW TCG

I was perusing my blogs this morning when I came across a post from Miss Elf, a blogger I frequent often.

She had been inspired by a Tales of a Priest to answer the following question:

Why do you heal?

This got me thinking.  Why do I heal?.. wait a minute.

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

I don’t heal! Silly me, I’m the exact opposite! That changes things!

Why do I DPS then?

The answer is simple; I like my opponents dead.  I like feeling like it’s a race to the kill, and if I don’t give it my all, the group dies.  A perfect example can be found in a post from Critical QQ about how a run didn’t go well because the other DPS stunk.  Without good DPS, you die.  That’s the moral of that story.

So we help the group kill things.  Big deal, so can tanks.  They just do it slower, right? So why aren’t you tanking?

Here’s the thing: tanks make sure I kill stuff by taking all the hits.  They don’t do nearly as much damage.  It’s just common sense that a Healer’s mana will run out long before you kill anyone if all there are in the group are tanks.  Plus, could you imagine the adds? Gluth would kick your butt without us DPS.

So why do I do this? Why do I DPS?

Because someone has to do the fun stuff, and I really don’t mind.

Honestly.