True Facts about the Rocco: Thoughts

Well, it’s done! No need to read the teaser script, watch the actual video. Here, I’ll even embed it because that’s a reasonable and nice thing to do.

Now, with that done and watched, that was weird. Compared to the earlier videos in the series (a series which you can access here) , this was twice as long. Two times longer. It was a surprising amount of effort to make all the voice work and write the lines. I hadn’t made that many consecutive jokes since that one time I went into a pun war, and puns barely count of humor most of the time… though I do love my puns.

Thing is, after having watched everything and analyzed the differences between TFATRocco compared to TFATFroggy G or TFATVoltar, I realized that maybe a went a bit overboard.

The video is twice as long and I can feel it while watching the video. Most people I’ve talked to have said that, yeah, it’s funny; but everyone has said it’s a little long, so that’s something I can fix for next time. Keep it short and sweet.

Another thing I felt that could use work was the thematic writing of the piece. Froggy G’s TFAT video had one or two big jokes I ran with from multiple angle: stealing bikes, being psychotic, and being uncounterable. Voltar’s was about his hero complex and planting the idea that he had a lot in common with Napoleon Bonaparte, with the overlying message of mental awareness. Rocco’s? F#@$ed if I know. I tried to make a joke about his really stocky legs, but it really didn’t work as well as I would have liked.

Overall, it looks like the video came out nicely. Went a little overboard, but that means I can work harder to make less stuff next time and have it be better… somehow. Efficiency!


Knesia first thoughts

1. Seriously? Scissors? What are we, Cutman? Well, cutWOman. But still! SCISSORS!?

2. Okay wow. She can do a lot of damage. For scissors, that’s really impressive.

3. Wait, is that an oculus rift? Why is she wearing that?

4. Oh that’s why. That’s creepy yo.

5. Wow she’s quite the uh… Sexy badass. Emphasis on the sexy. Like, stockings and no pants with a completely impractical loin cloth and killer legs.

6. At least she’s easy on the eyes… For a psycho barber.

7. Holy shit it’s the demon barber of Seville! But sexy.

8. Heh, she can do a barrel roll. Hehe. 

9. She looks a lot like Dark Lady from HoN.

10. Hot DAMN she does a lot of damage. Like wooooow.

11. I think I like her.

Teaser Post: True Facts about the Rocco

You have wanted.

You have waited.

You have wasted a lot of time doing the above. Right?

And now, for the first time since… ever… comes a teaser to a video by leaking a chunk of the script! ‘CAUSE THAT’S HOW HOLLYWOOD DON’T.

This time we explore…

True Facts about the Rocco


by pixelhat

Rocco works in law enforcement. He was at the top of his game until a corrupt congress-person forced Rocco to quit the force… permanently. This is a euphemism, a word meaning here that what I just said means something it doesn’t normally mean; in this case, instead of saying they tried to make Rocco retire from the force permanently, it means that they framed Rocco and tried to kill him… permanently. Naturally, Rocco did not take this kippin’ on his back like his Norwegian Blue cousins, and kicked the congress-person in the face with his huge muscled energy legs and said, “screw you, Mother *^$#%!@* I’m joining the Awesomenauts.” This is a lot like being kicked off the B-Team, kicking the leader of the B-Team in the balls, and then Joining the A-Team with Murdoch and Mr.T; except Murdock is a whisky drinking, bucket spitting, yeeehaawing horror and Mr.T forgot to wear pants to cover his stars and stripes thong that morning.


Watch the Full Video coming to the SlowWolf YouTube channel, coming soon!! Now with 10000000% more dick jokes!

Also, yes, this does mean I’m reopening the blog. No, it’s not WoW related. It’s going to be video games specific, and related to my channel. If WoW pops back up on here, it’s because I am weak and have given up on real life. Or because I really miss WoW, but I don’t have that kind of money.

Top 5 Survival Tips For Hunters

He didn't follow the tips.

Hunters have always had a reputation of being the dumbest WoW players, and that’s because a bunch of folk decided it’d be a good idea to play the class where they could shoot things and have their family pet Fuzzy in the game too.

This has bred a stereotype: hunters are casually based, easily aggravated 12 year olds with a serious ego complex; and if there’s anything they can do, surviving a 5 minute fight in a boss is not one of them.

Let’s make sure that we can by following a couple of simple tips.

5. You’re not the tank, and neither is your pet.

You, the hunter, are not a tank. You do not want aggro. You may be wearing mail, which is a step below plate, but here’s a secret.

The only thing that boss cares is if it’s in plate armor. If it isn’t, then it’s wearing cloth.

This is what you're wearing, and nothing else.

Studies have shown that 100% of hunters who let their pet or themselves gain aggro (under normal conditions) are total huntards, and have a much greater tendency to die shortly afterwards. It’s true! I conducted the studies myself.

Not to worry though! If you do manage to get aggro, there are ways to fix this small problem. Such as…

4. Misdirect can save lives.

This baroquely constructed skill is probably also the most uniquely crafted to saving your ass while returning the tank to his rightful place: as your meatshield.


So long as they don’t get in the way.

So what exactly are you supposed to do? First, make a macro that looks something like this:

#showtooltip misdirection
/cast [target=focus, help] misdirection; [help] misdirection; [target=pet, exists] misdirection
/target lasttarget

Once that’s done, make your tank your focus, so that the macro doesn’t  doesn’t break rule #5. Then activate the macro, and shoot the things that you need to! Congratulations, you’ve now actively conscripted your tank to take another beating!

Alternatively, you can force the monster to murder someone you don’t like; for instance, I remember fondly the one time I forced a boss to murder the most aggravating healer of all time. I wouldn’t make a habit of it though.

However, what I would make a habit of remembering includes…

3. Play Dead.

When shit hits the fan and even Misdirect can’t save you anymore, there’s only one more answer to saving your not quite so fabulous hide.

Feign Death.


Now would be a GOOD time.

Here’s a little song so you can remember how awesome it is.
When you’re the aggro man, and the game’s name is pain?

It’s time to Feign. It’s time to Feign.

Anytime you have aggro, or the area’s aflame?

It’s time to Feign. It’s time to Feign.

Did you like it? I know I did.

2. Eat food

I’m not even kidding. Go make a sandwhich, then come back. I don’t want you on an empty stomach. Eating has been shown to actually, you know, keep you alive. If you’re dead IRL, then you can’t raid/do ANYTHING.

So go make a sandwhich, have a glass of water, take a potty break, and then get back. I’m sure the article won’t go anywhere.

You know what? Take your time. Make a big juicy burger, sizzling with grease and delicious, tasty meat. Add some onions, take some crunchy lettuce, and add some Ketchup. Enjoy your meal with some people, friends, family… and then you can come back.

Or this. Take your pick.

I’ll wait, no worries.

1. Don’t stand in fire/black/voidzone/electricity/(Insert thing here)

There is no real need to explain this. If it looks like this:


Or even this:

AVOID IT. %$#@.


Initial Testing

Hello everyone! Just a quick update before the big post sometime this weekend on what I think works.

BM PvE has never been quite this loose before. There was usually just one way of doing things: for once, we now have some choices! I’m just trying to determine what works and when.

I promise the content is coming: all I ask is a little patience while I get the time to write it, the time to sort the data, and the time to really put out something worth reading.

Always Fabulous,

Testing, Testing…

Ever since the post where I put out what I thought was the best spec for BM PvE hunters, I’ve been a little perplexed.

Namely, the fact that someone had a different and, to my immediate knowledge, completely viable spec.  As a result, I needed to test this.  Why not let the elitist jerks do it? Because, frankly, they had about as much idea as I did.

Sadly, this meant less time writing, more time testing.  I’ll post the results of the test A.S.A.P.


The Sitch

Tracking time is a lot harder than it looks.

So the idea of posting and redoing all of my awesome guides in a prompt and quick fashion? Totally not happening.

My workload, despite my fabulous ability to do anything, is actually  far too large to leave hanging.  I will NOT be updating as frequently as I would have liked, but that’s just what happens when you’re being fabulous everywhere.

So please don’t expect daily posts, or even 3 times a week.  Maybe 1-2 posts, tops.  And that will do, because otherwise I would die.

So stay tuned, but be prepared for some wait times.